How to beat a pornographic addiction forever in 5 steps

Welcome To A Real Talk From An Ex Porn Addict

I want to let you know, that I really know how you feel right now as you keep looking for answers on how to beat a pornographic addiction.

I had a porn addiction for 24 years, after a friend told me about his struggle with it. I was a young ‘religious’ 13 year-old, who didn’t know anything about women… anything! You see, in Christian circles, we are encouraged to be ‘accountable’ with a brother BUT as with all things in life, a little wisdom goes a long way and I wasn’t ready to hear what my friend told me that night. So the first thing I did was go to Google to figure out what he was talking about, so as ‘to help him’!

I think I actually remember a whisper to not do it, BUT I ignored that prompt because it was my holy Christian duty to help a brother in need…

Of course, you know what happens next. I saw an image I wasn’t supposed to see and felt something I shouldn’t have felt, only until loving someone real as God intended all His pleasures to be. This all happened within maybe 13 seconds and as I embarrassingly cleaned myself up, my young mind was trying to process everything but especially ‘that look’ I had never seen before in a woman’s eyes.

I know! You’re probably thinking… 13 years old! That’s late!

And yes, you may be right but remember I had that ‘religious’ and protected upbringing, which is why I had no clue. But after seeing ‘the come hither look’ it would take 24 years from that first undignified sexual encounter before I got complete freedom from a porn addiction. Every time I looked at things progressively more ‘hard core,’ I could sense deep down it wasn’t right, even though it may have felt good for a minute, my conscious kept tugging at me. When it would happen again there was that same tug again and I would feel so completely powerless over the temptation and useless as a person who claims to serve a powerful God King.

Now, if you’re on this page you know exactly what I mean and I want to encourage you in faith that you are close to your breakthrough. You are taking the time to be here and read this post and that means there is hope for you too which is why I’m writing this today because I got free and I’m hoping my unique story will show there’s more than meets the eye when it comes to pornographic addictions.

This is why every time you have succumbed to ‘that look,’ you feel guilty even when not having had physical sex. As with all of our lives, this physical and temporal body is but a representation of a spiritual reality, which is permanently eternal. And like a good Marvel movie or Star Trek episode, there’s an invisible fight happening over your desires and affections, ultimately about who you will serve. There is only one option from two choices, The Light or the darkness to be your spiritual master. One is great as in way better than Asgard great and the other is a tyrant dystopian future! Now don’t worry if that doesn’t make perfect sense right now, as it will soon enough if you keep reading.

By the end of this very revealing post, I am going to give you a concrete plan of action which worked for me and a short prayer to the only true God because it will be needed for this enemy rank as Jesus once put it Himself. This will once and for all help you to beat a porn addiction.

In my personal struggle, I had moments of strength, where I could go maybe two months without hard porn, but even then I would look way too long at scantily clad girls popping up most days. I personally didn’t have an issue with ‘those magazines’ as mine was a secret sin, which fueled the addiction’s power over me even more.

Now bear with me for a minute here…

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Because this is where the unique part of my story comes in because I only got free from pornographic addiction after a dramatic and powerful spiritual encounter. Yeah, I know! I know it seems out there but as God is my witness, the facts speak for themselves – as of February 2024, I have been clean for 17 months! That is the first time I can actually say that, since being that 13 year old boy.

It’s So Big For Me Personally, That I Call It A Miracle!

I 100% understand if you might not be ready for that terminology yet, so let me say something else I’m sure you will agree with:

• You can’t beat a pornographic addiction or any addiction alone. You know that you need help.
• You are painfully aware of the odds stacked against you where sex is everywhere! Even tech giants work against you when even pausing as you read an online newspaper and a ‘dodgy ad’ appears, it gets tracked and especially because you’re a man, suddenly ‘those ads’ are everywhere on your mobile device.

So yes, the struggle for pure, unadulterated, righteous sex is real and only real men and women will ever experience it. But before we continue, let’s first confirm whether you actually have a pornographic addiction like I did.

Six Signs Of A Pornographic Addiction

1. You just can’t stop

The definition of any type of addiction whether it be food, cigarettes or pornography, is that you feel a need to stop but you simply cannot. You may even have moments of strength whether it be 1 day, 1 week or 1 month but as soon as some stimulant is reintroduced, all the neural pathways in your brain get lit up again and you will binge.

I remember from personal experience after a particularly strong season of about two months not watching porn because of a porn blocker that I figured out a way around it. That was one of my worst porn binges ever! This clearly showed me that the root issue hasn’t been addressed yet and despite two good months, I was still at that time very much addicted and enslaved. Sobering…

2. Productivity and financial issues

There is a Proverb that goes like this:

That loaf of bread reference is really interesting to me because one of the best known side-effects of a pornographic addiction is to be constantly distracted and lose productivity. It’s very easy to spend hours looking at harder and harder core porn to get your fix and this will have a huge impact on your ability to focus at work or run a successful business. When you keep looking at porn, especially at work, you will be inundated with the next symptom.

3. Guilt and shame

Those feelings of guilt and shame, especially if you were brought up at all religious are very real! It doesn’t matter if it was only a 5 minute ‘quickie’ either, as the voices in your head that told you to do it are very quick to tell you how ‘bad you are!’ And also if you’re in relationship that you should only be doing this with a real woman you love, which is the absolute truth.

Now if you haven’t told your loved one about your porn addiction, then you have a further complication with guilt that comes from hiding from someone. Someone who deserves and expects complete honesty from you, if you want the relationship to last. This was the case for me but maybe the next symptom is more your story.

4. Emotional mood swings

Pornographic addiction is clinically linked to depression, reduced self confidence and a tendency to isolate or hide oneself. This is a potent cocktail mix, which is sure to wreak havoc with your emotions if left unchecked or simply trying to handle it yourself. To further add insult to injury, you may even notice that your sleep cycle is being affected which always makes everything infinitely worse which again has another knock on effect.

5. A lack of interest in real sex

There is a good tension that is supposed to develop between a man and a woman that leads to the bedroom in a healthy relationship. But when another virtual woman or man is added to the mix, it interrupts that really good tension.

Now because all these websites and magazines have literal teams of people, to doll these women up you may even find yourself not being attracted to the real love of your life anymore! When she/he wants to have sex with you, you make excuses because you masturbated maybe an hour or two before or you make demands and force her to do things you saw those virtual women do. This will naturally lead to the next symptom, where if you haven’t already called for help, you better be quick as time is running out.

6. Relationship Chaos

What you have here is the real reason for why porn addictions are even a thing at all. The whole purpose of any type of addiction is to destroy you, whether it be through obesity, lung cancer or suicide because you don’t have any meaningful relationships left in your life.

It really is this serious!

For a lot of people, maybe even for you reading this right now, it’s trying to destroy with one small step at a time, the relationships in your life in order of importance. First and foremost your relationship with God, then the love of your life and even family and friends.

You may find yourself prioritising watching porn over spending time with your loved ones and friends and even when you do, you just want to watch porn. Naturally, this is incredibly unhealthy and if you’re at this stage right now, let me encourage you, as someone on the other side of it and with that, I have some ideas to share with you.

How To Stop A Pornographic Addiction

1. Write down your reasons:

Why do you feel it’s necessary to stop watching porn? Whether spiritual, emotional or just plain practical like you have a business to run and watching porn takes hours out of your day, whatever it is, write it down. As every motivational speaker on the planet will tell you, your why is your greatest asset to get anything worth doing in your life done.

2. Remove stimuli:

If you have any porn magazines around the house, get rid of them and consider using an accountability porn blocker like Covenant Eyes which not only blocks obvious porn but also uses AI to analyse those times you are looking at a raunchy image too long. It then sends that to a trusted accountability partner like your loved one or a close friend you have confided in.

3. Healthy distractions:

When you feel an urge coming over you, what is something else you really love to do? Is it going for a run, playing tennis or going to the gym? Because porn addiction is a physical addiction, do something else physical, like a sport where even just going for a walk will help you to break the cycle. Now it doesn’t have to be exercise, see what works for you, like a good book or a bath or just maybe a cold shower? 🙂

4. Tell Someone

This will do literal wonders as the power of any addiction is secrecy!

The absolute first and best place to start if you’re in relationship is to tell your loved one and if they really are your beloved they will want to help you in any way they can.

However, if you aren’t ready to tell your wife or partner, then a close friend you can trust will also initially work. However I want to encourage you to also tell your loved one because a secret like this between two lovers is a relationship killer.

Another option is support groups or maybe a counselling therapist but my warning would be to stay away from the drugs they too quickly prescribe before reading my story below. Because it’s the ultimate ‘pill’.

5. Pray

As in really pray! Like David spilling his guts out in The Psalms type talk!

Please don’t get all stuffy here as this is an honest conversation between you and God because remember He already knows everything you’re doing and is waiting for you to know that He knows! Contrary to popular opinion, He won’t strike you with a lightning rod when doing this… I’m still here.

So whether you’re religious or not, give this a try.

Turn your attention to the realms above and say,

God I need your help on this one, please remove this desire to look at porn!

Again, prayer doesn’t have to be all ‘holier than thou’, it’s just real talk with someone far, far, way far above more powerful than you are! At the end of your conversation with Him, make sure to also use the King’s name. So in the example above it becomes,

Now I know some of you might be struggling right now, with how I’m talking about Jesus because of Christian family or ‘friends’ you know, who to be honest, act like religious bigots and then condemn you!

But stick with me here because in my experience, I did all the 4 points above that the experts recommend including counselling and it didn’t work! I was miserably and completely stuck in the porn cycle for 24 years, until I took points 4 and 5 above, way more seriously and then something really incredible happened.

What Happened Next?

You may be wondering about that spiritual encounter I wrote about earlier. Well here we go…

After doing the above steps for about a year, which included being painfully honest with my beloved every time I even so much as looked at a girl for too long, I watched this video.

Near the end of the video, when he does a father’s blessing prayer – I felt a surging power like electricity flowing through my veins and I literally fell on my face because I knew it was Him! The Almighty One we hear so many rumours about and the first thing that got fried, was that lustful spirit!

It’s the most incredible mix of feelings and emotions (including a lot of reverential fear) when you meet your Maker! And all this time later, after having many similar experiences, I can tell you that the hallmark of it really being Him, will always be the complete peace and love you will feel deep down.

There’s a Bible verse that all Christians know, along the lines of, “There’s no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus” and I really got a sense of that intimate love when He touched me personally. This may sound strange, but in its own way, it really is way, way better than mere physical sexual pleasure! To be honest, sexual pleasure is but a faint echo or a dim shadow of the true pleasure and delights of spiritual intimacy available to you.

Now if you aren’t a Christian and you are getting really annoyed right now because all you have ever felt from so-called “Christians” is condemnation, I am truly sorry because it’s so common! Let me tell you a little secret, those people you’re thinking of don’t represent your Heavenly Father or Jesus! They might not be a true Christian or simply were or are still immature in their faith. If you would like to meet the real Jesus and not the fake one you think you know, just talk to Him. Simply say, I want to know You like this crazy Jean Paul guy knows You and I also want to be set free from this pornographic addiction.

I am agreeing with you virtually right now, in the name of Jesus, which is the name above all names that unlocks all doors and will release anyone from the prison of demonic slavery, which is what a porn or any addiction truly is. At you calling His name, the name of Jesus, they will literally come out trembling in electrocuted fear as they completely lose their grip on you.

Forget Marvel Heroes,
Jesus Is The Real Deal Mighty Hero!

Don’t believe me? I dare you to try it right now, talk to God! Whatever happens next, might surprise you.

P.S. You may also want to look at the Fear of God Writings (F.O.G.) I’m working on, which is trying its best to be as ‘unreligious’ as possible whilst maintaining the ancient’s phrasing about The God called יהוה YAHWEH and 2,000 years ago another name for Him was manifested in ישוע Yeshua (Yah’s Salvation).

Here is how the prophet Isaiah talks about the very issue of shame we’re discussing. Isaiah is describing a huge inheritance of justice, which the King of kings, יהוה YAHWEH ישוע Yeshua (Jesus) will give to all His sons and daughters (like you?) in His glorified new world order. The real New World Order btw.

You can enter into The Kingdom yourself, if you want and it doesn’t even cost a penny. But like any true love it will cost you, your old way of life in exchange for a better one. Curious? Find out more.